Tired of Pink

I'm not actually an enemy of pink. The fact that I wrapped my friend's baby shower gift in black rather than pink was at least as much about the convenience of black trash bags as it was about bucking the traditional association of girls with a particular color. I like flamingos and spoonbills. I own and sometimes wear a pink t-shirt. And come on, this guy is cool:

But I have become utterly fed up with two recent "pink" trends:

(1) The Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure breast cancer fund-raising pink ribbon logo being everywhere. I would like to be able to open magazines and drug store flyers, eat frozen dinners, cereal, and yogurt, and look at other people's t-shirts (Rush week this year was bad) without being subjected to this stupid logo. OK, it's pink and breast cancer attacks girls (wait, I mean, women), I get it.

It's not that I am opposed to trying to raise funds to find a cure for cancer. Duh. I have given money to people doing the Run/Walk/Bike/Horseback ride/Cartwheel/Hop on one foot for the Cure. I'm even only slightly annoyed that this group is causing the perception that breast cancer is the number one killer of women in America, while it actually remains heart disease. (The heart disease people have their own campaign featuring the color red that isn't nearly as ubiquitous.)

But overexposure to the annoying logo, with all its girlish pinkness, is hardening my heart. I'm sure there is a ton of research on how women are more concerned with their health, are motivated to support woman-centric campaigns, are more influenced by social marketing, etc., etc., but it still irks me to some extent that I can't stand in front of the microwaving heating up my favorite Sesame Chicken frozen dinner without looking at an offer to buy one of three ugly pink lunchbags for $9.95, $5 of which goes to the Susan G. Komen people. (Hungry Man dinners do not sport a baby blue ribbon logo to remind the consumer to send money to find a cure for prostate cancer.)

I would probably be less annoyed if the money-raising pleas were accompanied at least some of the time with a reminder that I should be doing breast checks, having mammograms, etc. I am sort of irritated that the only action item is "Send us money." "Empowerment through money expenditure on girlish pink crap" is not such a great message.

(2) It is becoming increasingly difficult when I see a woman at school wearing pink sweatpants with the word PINK in huge letters across the ass not to walk up to her and say, "Did you realize that the creation of the 'Pink' line from Victoria's Secret was motivated by their desire to break into the middle-school aged girls market and they only used college-aged women to act as 'brand ambassadors' to serve as role models for the tweenies?* You are a frickin' tool. Also, do you want to play Barbies sometime?"

* Source: Solomon, M. R. (2006). Consumer Behavior, seventh edition.

The upsurgence of pink at VS has had the additional problem that their reliably my-sister-sized pajamas that do not look like they accidentally walked themselves over from Frederick's of Hollywood are always pink. How many pink pjs does one woman need?

Of course, I am kind of against VS these days in general. I think the switch happened sometime after 98% of their bras became about giving the wearer the impression of being at least one cup size larger and when I first saw their catalog featuring their ostensibly office clothing offerings. I mean, jesus christ, these clothes look like the fabric incarnation of a Cosmo article about "Ten Ways to Use Your Sexuality To Get Ahead at Work."

Oh. My. God. On a whim, I googled "Barbie" and "pink" and came up with this: the Barbie Collector Pink Ribbon Barbie Doll.

"Product Features
Barbie Doll contributes to fighting breast cancer
Pink Ribbon Barbie is both a tool to help those affected with breast cancer talk to girls, and a way to support the cause
She wears a pink gown with a signature pink ribbon pinned to her shoulder
$2.50 is donated to the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation for each doll sold, with a guaranteed minimum donation of $25,000.00
Age Range 6 Years And Up"

I cannot bring myself to look up "Pink Panther" and "breast cancer." I just can't.