Not As Far As I Know

Although I support Hillary as the Democratic candidate over Obama (not because I think she will lose, but because I prefer her), I was annoyed when I heard that she responded to a journalist's question about whether Obama is a Muslim by saying "not as far as I know." Of course, more recent reports (and the video you can see for yourself) show that this was a complete mischaracterization of what she said.

I sort of thought that a better response than the (untrue) "not as far as I know" answer would have been:

"I do not believe that Barack Obama is a Muslim.

Just because Muslims do not keep pet dogs, and Obama does not have a pet dog, does not mean that he is necessarily a Muslim. He could just be a complete animal hater, who despises all things cute and fluffy, as many other people suggest.

I also believe that the eyewitness accounts that he did, in fact, in 2003, run over a 10 year old boy's springer spaniel with his car, in front of the horrified boy and his younger sister, are exaggerations, or could be explained by some simple fact, such as that Obama was three sheets to the wind drunk at the time he mowed down that helpless, adorable puppy.

It was a terrible thing when Bill and my dog Buddy was killed in a tragic automobile accident, and we have been happy to still have the cuddly goodness of our cat Socks, who was a stray cat we rescued from the streets of Arkansas in 1991."

[Hillary hands journalist an autographed copy of her book Dear Socks, Dear Buddy: Kids' Letters to the First Pets, the proceeds of which benefit the National Park Foundation.]

Surely this would be enough to make Obama retort in a not-completely-safe place that Adolf Hitler was an animal-loving vegetarian. This would be a perfect Reductio ad Hitlerum that I believe, according to Democratic Party rules, would immediately disqualify Obama from the presidency. The Reductio ad Hitlerum can only be used against Republicans and, in times of dire desperation, independent candidates running to the left of the Democrats.